Baby Talk

So, if people don’t learn grammar in school any more, and they’re not bothering to read the handy usage guides that are in the bookstores, how DO people manage to speak and write correctly?

Mostly, it’s in the ear.

It’s a fascinating phenomenon, how we humans learn language. Babies begin learning the ins and outs of language as early as 10 months old and by the time their vocal cords are ready to pronounce words, they can tell a noun from a verb and can certainly recognize sentences spoken to them by their parents. (“I said no!“) (Hmm, maybe that was a bad example.)

By the time we are ready to speak, and certainly by the time we’re learning to write, we have a solid grounding in the way our language works. We can decipher what people say to us, we can construct basic sentences (“Love you!“) and we’re learning new words like little linguistic sponges, if sponges can be said to learn.

By the time we’re closing in on adulthood, the language center in our brains is pretty well formed, and we can recognize what is “wrong” just like we can recognize when a song is off-key, or when somebody’s outfit is tacky and ugly.

We might not be able to pinpoint why, exactly, but we know it when we see it (or hear it)–Usually.

I know a rose when I see one, even if I don’t know to call it a “Rosa Rosacae.” In fact, that may be a completely fake Latin name, and that’s exactly my point. I don’t need a degree in botany to be able to identify a rose when someone hands me a bouquet.

The same thing goes for language–I can know that when somebody says, “He were going to the store,” it is wrong because of that single noun/plural verb dichotomy, but when I hear, “He and I were going to the store,” my ear is happy because it’s plural/plural.

The problem arises when your ear is tricked.

Is it “Either you or I are going to the store,” or is it “you or I am“? As I understand it, “am” is correct because the noun is singular, although “are” sounds better to my ear.

Which is exactly why knowing what is correct is useful.

When a toddler lisps, “Me go, too,” as you’re walking out the door, the meaning is clear, even though the grammar is shaky. And, well, the child is just learning this stuff. Parents are just usually so happy that they’re starting to communicate in words instead of wails that they take what they can get. But, when a 30-year old says, “You and me should go to lunch today,” well, people are going to talk.

You know, not in a good way.

Do you agree? Disagree?