Comments on: Name and Address?

By: Perpetual Beginner

Perpetual Beginner — Fri, 04 Jan 2008 01:04:33 +0000

Huh. Maybe it’s because of where I went to college, but Ms. is what I always heard as a default (when it wasn’t Dr.). These days it sounds much more natural to me than either Miss or Mrs. I answer to “Ms. Wood” about ten times faster than to “Mrs. Wood” – Mrs. Wood is my mother-in-law.

By: french panic

french panic — Thu, 03 Jan 2008 22:02:25 +0000

I have absolutely no problem with getting a ma’am (I’m in my early 30s)- after all, it IS the feminine equivalent of “sir” — I’m not sure why it has such a fuddy-duddy reputation. It’s a sign of respect, and sounds a lot better than being called nothing at all.

Every female used to be called “Mrs.” regardless of marital status, but that changed a few hundred years ago… My peeve is when I am in one of those horrible stores where the staff has to glance at your credit card and then address you by name: as I look a lot younger than my age, I won’t receive any honorific and will be greeted by my first name – in that case, a Miss or a Ms. is totally preferred. Or a Mrs.

An honest mistake (Miss for Mrs., ma’am for the overly sensitive, Ms. for the anti-feminists) is nothing to get huffy about – I find it’s the women who freak out over being treated with politeness that end up looking like idiots, rather than the person who is trying to be polite.

By: J

Sun, 30 Dec 2007 22:04:40 +0000

Being ma’am-ed can ruin the day for me.

I’m a Ms., don’t see any reason for anyone to know whether I’m married or not just by my title. The minivan gives that away anyway. (OK, I don’t actually own a minivan, but it made me laugh. It’s the husband and kid in tow that actually gives it away.)

By: Gillian

Gillian — Sun, 30 Dec 2007 01:14:38 +0000

Ma’am is also taught to all military personal so any young person addressing a woman of higher status, which can include age, is doing as he or she was correctly taught. IMHO. I prefer good manners to worrying whether I’m too young to be addressed that way, though the first time it happened, I was somewhat surprised. And I never liked being called Miss by students when I had been married for 10 years. To me, they’re trying to be polite and have not been well-taught.

By: Sue

Sue — Sat, 29 Dec 2007 17:52:38 +0000

I still have a hard time addressing “grown-ups,” people of my parents’ generation who I knew when I was growing up, by their first name. Friends that I have made on my own who happen to be older, though, I have no problem with using their given name.

I actually don’t really mind being called Ma’am. Then again, I spent nearly 10 years living in the South. Rural North Carolina is full of Ma’am-ers. It just seems respectful. I don’t often say it myself anymore, but I have been known to let slip a “Sir”.

By: Lisa, The Correspondent

Lisa, The Correspondent — Sat, 29 Dec 2007 17:44:08 +0000

I’ve been reading your blog awhile, but can’t remember exactly how I found it (either a link or a Google search on grammar).

Amen to the “ma’am” stuff. I started getting “ma’am”-ed several years ago while in my late 30s and felt it was terribly premature.

On the flip side, however, I detest being addressed as “hon,” “sweetie,” “sug,” etc. It’s all too common where I live, and it’s especially hard to hear coming from folks a lot younger than I am.

At a drive-thru one time, a guy in his late teens kept “hon”-ing me to death, and when both the money and the meal had finally exchanged hands, he said, “Thanks, hon.” I looked him in the eye and said, “You’re welcome, son.” I think he got the point.